


Slam Poems

by MamaBear10618



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:55:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21821284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MamaBear10618/pseuds/MamaBear10618
Summary: Slam poems: a form of poetry without structure. Allows the author to let thoughts emotions and opinions flow out in their writing.Every chapter will be a different slam poem written by me on whatever topic.





	1. Shriveling;

**Author's Note:**

> First work! I hope you enjoy.
> 
> This slam poem is about my depression I experience and how my family is the root of it with their arguements.

Behind a door.  
I am dwindling.   
Dwindling like fire without air  
Dwindling  
Dwindling.   
Hope is dwindling.   
I am dwindling.   
Behind a door

Yelling and yelling   
Raising voices like the sun and moon  
Up and down and up and down.   
The sun and moon pursue one another   
through an endless cycle;  
My mother is the sun  
My father is the moon.

They never stopped.  
Never ceasing their arguments…  
Never halting;  
Not for their dwindling daughter  
Not for their trainwreck daughter  
Not for their crumbling daughter.  
They always needed to prove  
A point that was certainly ludicrous.   
Their endless conflicts made the home   
Far from the Garden of Eden. 

I continued dwindling.   
Diminishing  
Declining  
Ebbing.  
Till I escaped.   
Opening the door  
Revealing;  
Exposing my world  
To what’s been behind my doors   
My whole life. 

I am frightened  
Paralyzed from the fear of the unknown  
The outcomes of my actions  
Paralyzed to the point   
Where I can’t make a move

I don’t want to be forced  
Forced into these decisions  
Forced into thinking a certain way  
Forced into taking initiative

I want to do it at my pace  
I want to do it my way  
I want it all to be alright...

I want others to know that I am content.  
Content with where I am  
Physically and emotionally. 

I am done  
Trying relentlessly   
To please and satisfy  
Everyone else. 

So in the end  
I am shriveling  
Behind a door.   
Even if the door is cracked…  
Not all of the world knows what I’m struggling with...


	2. Achieving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Over achieving: when your expectations of yourself are so high that you can never reach what you truly want. Perfection.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy!

I am always reaching.  
Attempting to grasp for more accomplishments  
Needing validation for myself  
Not feeling proud of myself  
Desiring more for myself. 

I want someone to be proud.  
To see what I've done  
The struggle I went through to get what I have  
But they say they are proud.   
Of my accomplishments  
Never that I got through it

Will I ever stop this endless cycle  
Of always needing recognition?

Will I ever stop reaching  
For something more than I already have?

I reach for the clouds, stumbling across success  
Like a clumsy fool  
I reach;  
I move to another level of the clouds higher and higher,  
Better and more success  
More accomplishments  
And then I fall  
I fail  
I impact into the ground and look up at the sky  
Beginning to cry  
As I watch the clouds roll by.  
Seeing what I had done,  
How exceptional my success was  
And my tears become heavier

I stay in the dirt  
Ashamed that I have failed  
Feeling like no one is proud  
Having no strength from my fall

I sit up and see where I have fallen  
Sometimes it's a peaceful meadow  
Or a quiet little town  
But the place that I fall at  
Frequently gives me inspiration  
And I stare at the clouds once more  
Swearing that I will get higher than last time

With every fall though…  
Each redemption is harder and harder  
Bouncing back from falling  
From such great heights of achievements  
Strips me of the little confidence I had

I am continuously achieving.  
But to me  
Only the big ones count  
The substantial ones  
Have importance to me.  
One day though..  
I will be able to trust all achievements;  
Even if it means being contented with myself for a day.


End file.
